Day 31

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Dear Steroids,

After 3 doses of you a day for the last 30 days, we became accustomed to your wild ways, your crazy eating habits, and your mischievous antics.  We dreaded your lows yet we rejoiced in your highs.  When you woke us multiple times a night to binge eat, we cursed you.  When you couldn't make up your mind and it seemed nothing would satisfy you, we wished you would leave.  And when you got a little mean and told us to move whenever we were near you, you made us sad.  I don't exactly remember inviting you into our lives, and for a while there, it seemed as if you would never depart.  You were not a pleasant or polite guest.

And now that you're gone, I gotta tell you, we don't miss you.  I haven't thought about you once all day.  Only now, as I lay down to sleep, do I realize how much better the day was without your presence.  In your absence, we are calmer and happier and a lot less hungry.  We feel like ourselves again (only a little fatter and a lot puffier). 

We hope we never see you again.  So I just want to put it out there...please do not come back.

Daily update:

Every day seems to bring another roadblock.  This morning, Ari woke up with a fever and some funky smelling poop, and he was quickly diagnosed with an infection in his gut (common effect from being on anti-biotics for so long).  No infection is good, but this one is easily treated and doesn't require the removal of his central line.  Phew.  The worst part of this is Ari is considered contagious until he's had a week of anti-biotics after his blood counts rise.  And, this infection does nothing to help them rise.  So the little dude is confined to his room or the outside garden/playground (and our secret outdoors activities) for a while.  No playroom, no arts and crafts, no riding his car through the halls, no walking in and out of rooms, and no playing with all of the nurses and their equipment at their station.  I'm going to try to get creative with indoors activities and bring out all of the new toys (thanks folks) he has received over the last few weeks to keep him entertained.

Blood counts remain steady.  Come on white blood cells!  We need you.

Final results from the bone marrow biopsy showed nothin' cancerous in the marrow.  It looked like recovering bone marrow.  This is good, I guess, but really nobody knows what's happening in there until the marrow starts producing something.  At this point, it could go either way.  They will re-test early next week.    Til then, we wait and wait (and Ari has diahreah from his infection and I have diahreah from my anxiety.  I'm kidding.  But I would be having diahreah if I wasn't pregnant.)

Even with fever and runny stools, Ari was in a fantastic mood all day (and took a 4 hour nap).  He wanted to take a bubble bath for the first time in 6 weeks, he ate normal foods all day (fruit and lean protein, no interest in potato chips or french fries), and he had a lot of fun singing and dancing and doing the chicken dance for anyone willing to participate in his silliness.

Please please please let his blood counts do something good over night! 


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